Tomorrow our nation will bid a final farewell to Betty Ford. She was our First Lady from August 9, 1974 till January 20, 1977. Not a long time, but an important time. When I learned of her passing on July 8th I thought back to that tumultuous period when we watched Watergate unfold. And then rather suddenly, Mr. Nixon resigned and Jerry and Betty Ford moved into the White House. I liked Betty, she was my mother’s peer. Betty was born April 8, 1918, 16 days after my mother was born. Don’t get me wrong, my mother didn’t personally know Betty Ford. But there is something about First Ladies that seems to capture our attention and we look for ways to identify with them, maybe because they make our White House a home.
I was a baby for most of Bess Truman’s time in the White House; she was a little older than my paternal grandmother. I remember Mamie. I often wonder if my mother cut our bangs so that our hairdos would resemble Mamie's. I know in 1955 my mother-in-law wore her hair like Mamie Eisenhower. I also remember winning an essay contest for writing about President Eisenhower and my husband went to college with their grandson, David. There is too much to say about Jackie. We shared in her joy, every woman wanted have her natural good looks, we cried with her, we mourned with her and she taught us how to heal. Many years later I hosted her son, John, at our country inn. Lady Bird brought daughters into the White House. Linda Bird and Luci were my peers. We were able to share in their weddings. Pat Nixon’s real name was Thelma Catherine Ryan Nixon. To me Mrs. Nixon always seemed sad, but she glowed whenever she talked about her daughters and we enjoyed watching Tricia being married in the White House. I will come back to Betty. Rosalynn Carter was sweet and charming. I remember we were excited that a young girl, Amy, would be moving into the White House. In 1985, 26 years ago this summer, I had a private breakfast with President Carter in the Anchorage Airport. He was in the Alaska Airlines’ First Class Lounge waiting for Mrs. Carter to get ready to catch a flight. And the story goes on...Nancy, Barbara, Hillary, Laura and now Michelle. Each has let us into their life, just a little. But none will compare to Betty.
Six weeks after becoming our First Lady, Betty Ford underwent a radical mastectomy. Up until that time no one really talked about breast cancer, at least we didn’t talk aloud about it. We feared it. Betty Ford went public and perhaps saved many lives by her willingness to discuss it. Most forget that Happy Rockefeller, then Second Lady of the United States, underwent a mastectomy just two weeks following Mrs. Ford’s surgery.
Betty stood for much more. She worked tirelessly for women’s rights marching in Washington, D.C. for the Equal Rights Amendment. She was openly pro-choice. TIME magazine called her the country’s “Fighting First Lady”. In 1978 she and her family went public with her alcoholism and addiction to pain medicine. And once again, she stood tall and realized that the disease of addiction shadows almost every American family; she and her family took on the crusade to help people find recovery. In 1982 the Betty Ford Center opened in Rancho Mirage, CA. on the Eisenhower Medical Center Campus. I never met Mrs. Ford, but having worked in the addiction and recovery industry I did tour the Betty Ford Center. I met Jerry Moe, Vice President, National Director of Children's Programs for the Betty Ford Center and to this day he continues to deliver the long standing message of the Betty Ford Center... “serving patients, saving families”.
Tomorrow, July 12, 2011, services will be held to honor Elizabeth Ann Bloomer Warren Ford - Betty Ford. I understand that Rosalynn Carter will deliver one of the eulogies. I find comfort in this. Betty was a fighter, she was generous, offering each of us a part of herself. She taught us to talk about diseases that shatter a person’s life and a family’s life. She was anything but anonymous. She was brave and candid.
The tragedy in Tucson began on a beautiful Saturday morning, January 8, 2011. I live in Tucson, Arizona, not far from the now famous Safeway. Gabby Giffords is my U S Congresswoman. That morning I went out to run an errand with my husband, and while we have long "liked" Representative Giffords' Facebook page, we did not know about her planned 'Congress on Your Corner' event. On our second outing of the day we were turned around by Pima County Sheriffs. We didn't know why, but something instinctively felt bad. So we agreed to go home. Within minutes of being home we learned of the nightmare that was unfolding just four miles from our home. Funny, some of my out-of-state friends called or wrote to make sure I was Ok, as they thought this was just the kind of event I would have tried to attend! I do not have to revisit all of this past week, but I was taken by the Arizona Star Tuesday morning headline "Obama Coming Here Wednesday". I read the details: open to the public, free, University of ArizonaMcKale Center, doors open at 4:00PM.
Cherry St view U of A
I made up my mind that I was going to try to attend this event that was being provided by our University of Arizona. My family supported me in my efforts. My reason for writing today is to give you just one person's perspective of the Together We Thrive Tucson & America Memorial.
Around 12:15PM, Dennis, my husband, drove me the 5 miles to the McKale Center. Upon arrival I was directed to walk to the end of the line. I found myself behind five young adults (two were veterans) - Chris, Tim, Juan, Valerie and Ann. I think it was Chris who determined that we were 3/10ths of a mile from the main door of McKale Center. Would we get in? We didn't know, but we did know that the center holds roughly 14,500 people. Chris did the math and figured we had a good chance, so for the next four plus hours we stood, for the most part quietly, you might even say reverently. Conversation was simple, people introduced themselves to their queue-mates, some people read, some took pictures. We discovered that the college buildings (Steward Building) around us were open and available for us to take turns using restrooms. Imagine...you could take a break, get out of the sun, freshen up and return peacefully to your place in line.
Together We Thrive T-shirt
As the afternoon progressed...volunteers walked the line and gave us guidelines to follow: no purses, no backpacks, photo ID. Surprisingly, people walked the line offering free water! We were grateful and happy. Even the one vendor who sold water was welcomed. At 3:45PM the line started to move. We moved slowly...at this point in the day I kept taking breaks sitting down on the curbside (too many hours of standing in the sun). The volunteers walked the line again only this time they were carrying the now famous T-shirts, navy blue with the logo Together We Thrive Tucson & America. They offered us a free T-shirt. We were stunned. They didn't ask for money, they just said we could have a T-shirt. In fact, we could have more than one if we wanted.
We (Chris, Tim, Juan, Valerie, Ann and I) stayed together. They watched over me, knowing I was at least 35 years their senior. As we approached the ramp to the front door of the McKale Center we were offered Black and White ribbons to wear. These were given to us by the Homicide Survivors Inc of Tucson, AZ. "The white ribbon represents hope for a peaceful nonviolent society. The black ribbon is in remembrance of all who have died as a result of violence." My fellow citizens: men, women, young, old, mothers, fathers, students, handicapped and I were happy to pin the ribbons on our blouses, shirts, coats, hats. We quietly walked up the ramp, willingly emptied our pockets for the security detail, passed through the metal detectors, and solemnly walked into the center to find a seat.
Memorial Program
At this point, I was separated from Chris, Tim, Juan, Valerie and Alli. After all, I only had to find one seat, they, I knew, would want to sit together for this historical evening. I looked up and there in the first row of section 104 was one empty seat. Two young women asked me if I needed a seat. I smiled and nodded yes. Finally, I was in the arena. I was sitting! It was now 5:30PM. Looking down on the main floor I could see all of the media, the University of Arizona's Choir and Symphonic Choir, the Tucson Symphony Orchestra, the podium, and of course the four-sided closed circuit television screen. I realized that my seatmates had programs. I mentioned that I was hopeful I would be able to get one at the close of the memorial. Sweetly the man in front of me turned and handed me an extra program that he had received. We were indeed together for this evening. We were quiet, grieving and breathing a sigh of relief that we were together.
Suddenly, on the television screen we could see Dr. Peter Rhee and his fellow University Medical Center doctors. The only way to acknowledge these medical experts was to applaud them. And so, we applauded. When Justice Sandra Day O'Connor appeared, again we could only acknowledge her with our applause...and the next 30 minutes proceeded...Minority Leader Congresswoman Pelosi, Senator and Mrs. McCain, Senator Kyl, Secretary of Homeland Security Napolitano, U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder, Captain Mark Kelly...all seen clearly on the screen and applauded.
At precisely 6:00PM the Tucson Symphony Orchestra played Fanfare for the Common Man. It is a powerful and appropriate piece. The memorial program continued with a Native American Blessing, our National Anthem, a welcome by UA President Robert N. Shelton, UA Student Body President Emily Fritze, UA student and Representative Gabrielle Giffords' intern Daniel Hernandez Jr. followed by a reading from the Old Testament by Janet Napolitano and a reading from the New Testament by Eric Holder. Did we applaud? Yes, it was our way to come together and touch each other.
Finally, President Obama came to the podium. He began talking to us. We might have been sitting in our living room with a neighbor, brother, uncle. He welcomed us, he introduced us to others, told us about each of our fallen and injured and shared a story of how he had just visited our U. S. Congresswoman and friend, Gabby. And then he said: "Gabby opened her eyes!" And that is when I knew or felt it was true..."together we thrive!" We are not just surviving...going forward we can and will grow and flourish.
For those of you who know me, you know a lot about me. You may know that I once had a private impromptu breakfast with President Jimmy Carter and I once hosted John F. Kennedy, Jr. at our inn. These are personal moments in my life that are memorable and remarkable, but January 12, 2011, I shared a moment of history with my neighbors. The evening ended with a poem To the New Year by W.S. Merwin, U.S. Poet Laureate...
so this is the sound of you
here and now whether or not
anyone hears it this is
where we have come with our age
our knowledge such as it is
and our hopes such as they are
invisible before us
untouched and still possible
Spontaneously, my seatmates, strangers to me, touched my hands and thanked me for sharing the evening. Today I would like to thank the University of Arizona for being there in every way for all Tucsonans during our tragedy, helping us to understand and begin the healing process. Together We Thrive Tucson & America.
As always, I welcome your thoughts, comments, or questions.
If you are having trouble viewing the video, you can see it here.
The other day I received a phone call from my first cousin Mary Lou Egan Gilman. She was in Tucson for a quick visit. Mary Lou's father (Patrick) and my father (Joseph) were brothers. We have known each other all of our lives and it is Mary Lou and her older sister Bridgie who have researched a lot of our family's history and they even organized the 2006 1st Cousins' Reunion which took place in Great Falls, Montana. While visiting with Mary Lou she mentioned that she has all of the holiday cards that I sent over the past 30 years. Amazing! After Mary Lou left I got to thinking about our paternal grandmother - Mary Ann Ryan Eagen. I wondered if she ever wrote holiday letters. So today I thought I would share with you what I think she may have written in her 1921 Christmas letter. (I chose 1921, as this is the only group photo we have of all 13 Eagen/Egan children.) I hope you will read on...
Enjoy a larger version of the photo by clicking on it!
December 1921
Happy Holidays,
As you can see by the enclosed photo all the children are still here with us in Denton, MT. This has been a pretty busy year for me with the new baby. I think you know William was born October 13, 1920. Can you believe that Martin and I celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary this past August 20th and Baby Billy turned one on October 13, 1921? Since Billy was #13 ( I am considering it a lucky number) and I turned 42 this past May...I think Billy may be our last. I know when Lester Holt, the US Census taker, was here on January 17, 1920, (Joe and Mary's 2nd birthday) I was just barely pregnant with Billy. I think Mr. Holt would have fainted had he realized that come October there was going to be another Eagen to add to the 69 Main Avenue Eagen residence.
Though the war has now been over since late 1918 the economy is still not good, it seems like another depression. I am sure you realize that when the war started the money which had been invested in the railroad business was diverted to the war effort. Actually the last big project that Martin worked on was putting together several segments of the railroad between Arrow Creek and the Hoosac Tunnel. That project was only about 15 miles from Denton. Martin turned 50 this year, amazing he has been building railroads, in fact managing the business, since 1888 and he has seen a lot what with building lines across the Dakotas and then into Montana. Of course when his brother Jim died in 1911, Martin was really on his own here in Montana. He helped bring the railroad to a lot of the state...Great Falls, Augusta, Lewistown. We were thinking that things might get a bit better when Governor Dixon took office in January of this year. Do you know of Governor Dixon? His full name is Joseph Moore Dixon. He had been a US Senator representing Montana, but then he ran for governor. He is only the 7th governor of Montana. We are hopeful that he will be able to enact some of his reform proposals. Perhaps with a new governor and our new President Warren Harding there really will be a "return to normalcy." At any rate, I was excited to vote for the first time last November and appreciated that Mr. Harding was in favor of women's suffrage and all the children marveled at listening to his inauguration speech over the radio this past March!
Enough about the economy and politics. We now have eight boys (John, Pat, Mart, Jim, Dan, Tom, Joe and Bill), one shy of a baseball team! The older boys, John and Pat (and even Mart) enjoy following the news about Babe Ruth and his home runs, even though the Yankees lost the World Series. Maybe they will do better when the Yankees open their new stadium in the Bronx. Someone told the boys that the Yankees purchased 20 acres in the Bronx for their new stadium. They are also fascinated by all the talk of air travel and learning about the 1st US transcontinental air mail flight this past February. Most of our mail comes in by rail, it is hard to imagine the mail being flown across the country.
I haven't mentioned the girls yet. Margaret, our oldest, turned 19 this year. She has been such a big help to me with the baby and of course, the twins...Joe and Mary. Ann (17) and Ellen (14) enjoy spending time with Margaret. Imagine having three teen-age daughters in the house. Little Vera (6) and Mary (3) are in awe of their older sisters.
John (18), our oldest son, is working as a farm hand. That is why in this photo he is standing behind Pat. When he came home from work we were trying to organize the kids for this photo and he didn't have time to change out of his overalls, so he picked up the baby and ducked behind Pat!
I realize I should stop here and get this letter ready to mail. Also, it is almost time to start dinner. We will have a quiet Christmas holiday. We continue to offer prayers for the wounded war veterans and hope that the New Year will bring good news on the economic front.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year,
Love,
Martin, Mary Ann (Mame), Margaret, John, Ann, Pat, Ellen, Mart, James, Daniel, Vera, Tom, Joe, Mary and Bill
P.S. I hope you like the photo. I also managed to get a copy of the 1920 Census Report(see below)...look at all of our names on there. You can click on either image and they will get larger.
Saturday mornings are a good time for memories. Today while watching news coverage of Chelsea Clinton's wedding, I was taken by a segment on Luci Baines Johnson's wedding, August 6, 1966.
Yes, it was 44 years ago this week that I was given my first official assignment as Associated Student Body President of Cathedral Girls' High School, San Diego, CA. It was July 1966. President Lyndon Johnson's 19 year old daughter was getting married, having converted to Roman Catholicism just the summer before on her 18th birthday, Luci was marrying Patrick Nugent, a Roman Catholic. Rest assured I did not know Luci, but my school principal and the new Bishop of San Diego, Francis James Furey (this photo is Bishop Furey accepting the Mass offering from me, 1966) thought it would be a nice gesture for his Catholic girls' school to send a wedding present to the President's daughter, a young Catholic woman. My difficult task was to not spend a lot of money and to find a present that would represent San Diego. To tell you the truth even today, if you asked me to send you a gift that "says" San Diego I wouldn't know what to buy.(Of course you know if I were in San Francisco I would buy Ghirardelli chocolate, sourdough bread or a great photo of the Golden Gate Bridge.)
I actually made my way to an interesting candle shop. This shop was/is located in what is now referred to as Old Town San Diego. I found a beautiful candle and wrote, what I am sure was, a "touching" letter and sent it to Luci. On August 5, 1966, (the day before her wedding) Luci Baines Johnson signed a thank you letter to me. It is pictured here. The return address was simply The White House and the 1st Class postage was five cents!
Later today Chelsea Clinton and Marc Mezvinsky will celebrate their marriage. Here you can enjoy a public video of Luci's wedding. Patrick "Pat" and Luci were divorced in 1979 and their marriage was annulled by the Catholic Church.
To Life!
If you are having trouble viewing the video, you can see it here.
Do you have memories of the weddings of President's children? I would love to hear from you.
Image via Wikipedia
